Update: August 2024

 

2024 08 28

Hi everyone –

No news has been good news, this time!

I’ve been feeling fine, and was hoping that this would match the results of the routine CT scan I had yesterday ... it did!

I had been wondering what the layer of fluid outside my left lung, picked up by my May scan, had been doing. Well, it’s gone! And so has the nodule that it was related to! (Was inside my left lung.) Vanished!

There is absolutely nothing new, and most of the lung nodules have decreased in size. The two that Garth monitors have decreased by 18% and 15% respectively.

So the Tamoxifen is doing its work. The niggly side effects (feeling slightly menopausal, etc) are manageable and – to me – worth it.

Right now, I do have a respiratory infection of some sort (and wrapped up warmly when Gail took me for yesterday’s scan), but it’s the first in exactly a year, as my immunity has returned to normal. It’s also exactly a year since the PET scan confirmed that the lymphoma was gone and that the chemo had also reduced the breast cancer nodules that we continue to monitor.

Yesterday I told Gail that I was hoping there’d be rainbows – there were, but she saw them only after she’d dropped me back at home. So I don’t have a photo from yesterday – this one is from a few weeks ago.

I want to extend the energy and symbolism of rainbows and hope to everyone who is dealing with any sort of challenge at the moment – many of you who are precious to me are facing challenges related to health, work, finances, home maintenance, aging, relationships, loss ... whatever they are, may you find the hope and courage to do and be the best possible in the circumstances.

Thank you, always, to all of you for your ongoing love, support and presence in my life.

Lots of love  🌹❤️

 

Update: July 2024

2024 07 10

 

Hi everyone – wow, already a month since my previous update. I’m feeling fine, with no more rib-region pain (it just faded away). And I’ve adjusted to the Tamoxifen now: feeling like myself again and just getting on with life, including (especially!) dancing.

We’ve been keeping as warm and dry as we can during the storms, and Gail is amazing with getting Neria out for walks the moment there’s a break in the rain. Quite an achievement as, according to my rain gauge (which I’ve at last put up), we’ve had almost 200mm since Sunday. (Photos: Sunday morning when it was all starting, and then a brief respite on Monday afternoon/ evening.)

My work life is a bit challenging right now, with two unexpected closures. (I’m very grateful that the work is to supplement my monthly pension rather than being my primary income!)

The work for one of my clients, editing their online legal training course content, ground to a halt about three months ago: the company has been liquidated (while still owing me for work already completed – they say I’ll eventually receive at least some of it).

And then, a week ago today, DM168 made the decision to stop proofreading all of the pages that I’ve been doing since I restarted there (lifestyle, wellness, arts & culture and a few more) for cost-cutting reasons. I worked my last shift on these pages yesterday, and am feeling sad about that today. All I’ll be doing for them from now on is editing the content of MavericKids (about 2 hours a week).

On the positive side, I’ve been enjoying editing some website and publicity content for an exciting enterprise recently launched by two long-time friends and associates of mine. (Thank you! You know who you are!)

I’m hoping to find further interesting editing and data analysis projects to work on.

I’m also using the time to complete the book I’ve been writing on my health journey, especially about last year. Most of what’s in it will be familiar to you, but watch this space anyway... I’m just starting the editing process with another long-time friend. (You know who you are, too! Thank you!)

Wishing everyone safety in the current extreme weather conditions (cold and storms here / heat and unexpected weather elsewhere in the world), the best possible outcomes for the many governance changes taking place all over, and success in every single initiative taken towards peace and compassion.

Lots of love  🌹❤️

 

Update: June 2024

2024 06 09

 

Hi everyone – just letting you know that I’m still standing (and dancing), after the first ten days of taking Tamoxifen. It’s never easy to discern what causes what, especially after being a bit knocked by finding out that the previous medication was no longer working. But I can assure you that Tamoxifen has not caused me to feel like jumping off anywhere (as the short-lived first one I tried in 2022, before Exemestane, did).

At the same time, I have had a few twinges here and there, which can be “flare” pain as the Tamoxifen starts to do its work (I learnt about this, first-hand, in 2022).

Since Friday, I have also had what feels like a sore intercostal muscle – I’m hoping that’s all it is, rather than a cracked rib (I do know that my ribs will always be at risk). If it isn’t improving by tomorrow, I will have it checked. I did manage to do (and teach) some gentle circle dances yesterday, and avoided any sort of pulling in the circle.

Several of you have been going through issues of your own: colds, flu (including swine flu), Covid, falls, medical procedures, ongoing cancer treatment, and tests ... I wish all of you an excellent and full recovery / best maintenance of wellness. And, for those who tend to overdo it ... please take time to stop and smell the roses!

Lots of love, always 🌹❤️

2024 06 11

Hi all – a quick note to say I had an X-ray today, and they couldn’t see any fractures or abnormalities in my ribs. So it does seem to be muscular, which is a relief. (Very early this morning, I had had a sensation that something had clicked back into place – the pain didn’t just stop at that moment, but it did seem to start easing. All these puzzles!)

Thanks, as always, for all the support and encouragement. I send mine to whoever needs it.

Lots of love 🌹❤️

 

Update: May 2024

2024 05 23

(The photo is from 10 days ago, when Gail and I went up the mountain in the cable car.)

Hi everyone – an update after having my three-monthly CT scan yesterday, and receiving the results at consultations with both Danie and Garth today.

This checkup was not the best I’ve ever had (I think last November’s one wins that prize hands-down), but nor was it the worst – by a very long way. It signals the return to exactly what I have been dealing with for almost three years now – breast cancer, as a chronic condition that we are managing, and where weird stuff is going to pop up every now and then.

For anyone who doesn’t like to read medical details: I’m basically fine, and we’re tweaking my treatment in order to keep me fine.

For those who want details:

From the lymphoma side: all is completely and totally good. There is absolutely no sign of lymphoma whatsoever. Yay yay yay!

From the breast cancer side: the neverending story continues. The existing nodules in my lungs are reasonably stable, but there is also a new one towards the back of my left lung, and there’s a thin layer of fluid outside that lung, near that nodule. In addition, one of the existing spots on my bones (this one on my right sacrum) has slightly increased in size.

To me, these phenomena constitute “weird stuff”, especially as I feel so well. (Although I did have some twinges in the region of that fluid a while back, but thought I’d pulled a muscle, especially when the twinges disappeared shortly after a Body Stress Release treatment.)

The treatment I’ve agreed with Garth is that we’re changing my medication from Exemestane (Aromasin) to Tamoxifen. The “weird stuff” is actually an indication that Exemestane has run its course. Garth warned me, when I met him, that this would probably happen. It’s rare for people with this breast cancer to be able to use the same medication for more than 18 to 24 months. I’ve had mine for 25 months. Please hold thumbs that I can deal with the side effects (or that I don’t experience any) from Tamoxifen! I have been able to deal with Aromasin (unlike the one we tried before it).

If Tamoxifen gets the “weird stuff” to subside, we won’t need to do anything more, for now. If it doesn’t, I’ll need radiation in both those areas.

We’ll check this in three months’ time, but I also have strict instructions to request a check sooner if I feel the need – if I cough or have more twinges in those areas. (Isn’t it strange how I didn’t feel the need for this week’s checkup at all, and yet it proved so very necessary! Early detection is key. Please remember that.)

After the elation of the past few months, I feel a little pricked-balloonish, but I’m sure I’ll soon feel more balanced again. After all, I’m alive and I feel well! I’m also thrilled at how well it’s going with the new circle dancing sessions (supplementary to all the existing ones) I’ve started up recently. Thanks to everyone reading this who has joined those sessions – I love having you there!

Thank you, all of you, for your ongoing love and support and encouragement. So much love from me to you! 🌹❤️

Update: April 2024

2024 04 19

Hi everyone!

No news does continue to be good news.

Yesterday was the first anniversary of the day I started what I’d sworn I’d never do: chemo. I wrote the following yesterday (and this is the first chance I’ve had, to send it to you):

I had already started coming back from the brink, five days before receiving my first chemo. But today, 18 April, is the “standout” date. It’s also auspicious because it matches two wedding/relationship anniversaries and two birthdays, of people who mean something in my life.

Without that treatment, I would have lived only a handful of weeks more. And with that treatment, here I am – writing this as Gail and I fly home from our first visit to Gauteng since we left, having seen many (but certainly not all) of the family and friends we wanted to see, and having demonstrated to the people we saw that I’m really, really fine (and not just saying so). We’ve also managed to dance (Gail once, me twice), reunited with many of the circle dancers we left behind in 2021.

Huge appreciation to Lindy and Paul, Jane and Piers, for having us to stay, and to everyone who made the time to spend precious moments with us. To everyone we didn’t manage to see: we’re sorry we couldn’t be there longer, and we hope to see you next time – or in Cape Town!

Your part in my process has brought me to where I am now. Thank you, always!

Lots of love 🌹❤️

(Photo: This rose used to live with us in Pretoria. It is now loved and cared for by Lindy. It smells divine!)

 Update: February 2024

 

2024 02 03

Hi everyone - an update in response to some of the people in my updates chat group:

I'm happy to say that I'm really, really fine! (Being fine does include residual neuropathy in the soles of my feet, being more allergic to dust and pollen than I've been since my teens, and some fatigue - none of which bother me very much.) Still enjoying the chemo curls! My perm, courtesy of Discovery Health.

January was a busy month, with a lot of work; regular circle dancing; ongoing participation in my sister Rosemary's "Walking Connective"; witnessing the various life experiences of my siblings and their children; tracking the shenanigans of our local residents' association (which includes a little recreation club and pool; compulsory membership; problems resolved at last at a big meeting on 30 Jan); and also seeing some people very dear to Gail and me - some of them after a long time.

And reaffirming that all of these things are why I really, really wanted to continue to live when I had to make that big choice last April.

(Photo: a flame lily at Kirstenbosch last weekend.)

I'd love to hear how January was for you. (That's a real question, not an idle one.)

February is the first anniversary of realising that things weren't quite right for me. Remembering the conundrum of hearing that the routine CT scan had shown anomalies in my spleen. All of us being puzzled. And me being extra puzzled, because I felt so very well at the time. And then even that changed, and I eventually didn't feel well at all.

Anniversaries can be triggering, and I'm no exception. That's even though I have absolutely no regrets. I've surprised myself by realising this. In discussion with Renee (my wonderful analyst - I don't mention her often, but she's walked alongside me on many journeys including this one), I've come to understand how profound this past year has been for me, and how it has changed me. As part of that, I am so blessed to receive the love and support of all of you.

This month holds a PET scan, in about two weeks' time (date not yet confirmed), and appointments with both Garth and Danie (21 and 22 Feb respectively). Every three months, for the rest of my life, I'll be having a PET scan or CT scan. Sometimes I wish they could be less frequent, because they do ratchet up the "what-if" anxiety levels, but - having seen how quickly and silently things can change - this would not be a good idea.

So that's my update. I hope it's not too much information!

I'll send out another update after seeing Garth and Danie.

Much love and appreciation to all of you 🌹❤️

2024 02 21

Hi everyone – I'm thrilled to be able to tell you good news!

Garth's feedback today, from Monday's PET scan, is that there continues to be no sign of lymphoma, and my bones are all fine – including where I've had radiation. The existing nodules in my lungs (from the old breast cancer) haven't changed at all since last time. Same number of them; same sizes. They show the same amount of activity as before, but that's expected and they are under control.

No change to my current treatment (one small Aromasin pill per day) from Garth's side. He's also thrilled with how I am.

Tomorrow's consultation with Danie is probably just a formality. I will let you know what he says, though.

What a wonderful relief! Gail and I were hopeful, but we were also trying not to think too hard.

Thanks, as always, for all your love and support.

I so wish that we could all somehow direct our love and support in a way that could turn around the craziness in this world and bring peace. We continue to try!

Lots of love 🌹❤️

2024 02 25

Hi again – as promised, a quick update after seeing Danie on Thursday. He didn't need to add to, or change, anything that Garth had said. So – all going well – the next check will be a CT scan in the third week of May.

Yesterday there was a wonderful rainbow locally, for ages. That's the third time there's been one, around the time of my checks with good news!

May we all be the rainbow in someone's cloud. (Thanks, Estelle, the first person I ever heard that from!) 🌈

Lots of love 🌹❤️

 

 

Update: January 2024

2024 02 01

Hi everyone! I hope you've had a good start to 2024, and that it will continue to be so. 

For me, no news continues to be good news (but a couple of people have asked, so I thought I should send out an update). 

My strength continues to build, I'm able to do most things that I used to do, and I currently have curly hair. It's known as "chemo curls", and it's fun while it lasts. (The photo, by Gail, is from the fantastic New Year's Eve circle dancing party that Phil had at his home. Thank you, Phil!) 

I also still have some neuropathy in my feet and occasional fatigue, as well as what I've come to recognise as PTSD (I'm sometimes suddenly extra upset by sad or unkind situations, or think that I should be busy with something other than whatever is happening in the moment, or feel overwhelmed by things that seem to be direct threats to my own health or wellbeing). All of this is entirely to be expected and will ease with time. 

I've just finished answering “24 questions for 2024”, which I found useful. If you want these questions, please go to https://judyklipin.com/. You'll need to subscribe to her newsletter to get them, and you can unsubscribe straight after that if you want to! 

Wishing all of you as much re-creation as possible (in whatever way is meaningful to you). 

I continue to pray for peace in our wild and wonderful world. 

Lots of love 🌹❤️